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Wednesday, April 30, 2008
rashes; blogg-ed at 5:18 PM
2papers dwn&th papers wasnt that bad.but th time was kind of short, i did rush for time actually.with no time to check the script thorughly, i hope i'll pass.grrrrr!i should be heading to civic due to th fact that hubby's working there.but, my body was covered with rashes.its annoying, hw i wish i could just scratch it off.issshhk!
basically i've just reached hm frm th doctor's with mum accompanying me, atleast i dont look weird alone.i already applied th cream&ate th pills.i'll be off to bed in no time nw.
&&its just rashes everyone, nt th HFMD cases okey?its only minor.dont get th wrong idea.
tomorrow's labour day&i hope my rashes will be gone by morn.i wana meet hubby, like really2 urgent.a few hrs with him yterday isnt enough.&speaking of th devil, we've just put dwn th phone.basically he just reached hm frm work&he wana take his nap, maybe later we'll meet if th rashes reduced.it is still pending.&you know what he say about my rashes?he said that i ate too much toblerone yterday when with him&i'm allergic to chocs.nt only that, i did say i have rashes on my butt too&guess what he said?i'm gonna be like an ape if i kept on scratching! wth?grrrrr.
i did confessed my instincts to him yterday&yes, i'm relieved nw.th reason he didnt call me up last monday was due to th fact that he went to jb with the friends, he was way too tired&th road was also packed with vehicles btween th peak hrs.they then dcide to go hm at 4in th morn.
&the reason he didnt call me up yterday's noon was because of he woke up late&hes needed to rush to international building for his working schedule.i did bump into him while walking arnd his block, never did i expect to meet him as i was already dwn.i did check on him at sp mac&also wdland's mart mac earlier, but to no avail.it was indeed shocking.
theres already no secrets btween us, period.i just hope it'll stay that way aye?no more third-parties ok dear?grrrrr.
i think i'm gonna take a rest nw, till then folks(:
Monday, April 28, 2008
pissed; blogg-ed at 8:35 PM
th weather's warm nwadays.i perspired alot, ate alot too.that feels wrong, grrrr.2more days till th first paper, i've been studying extra hrs&i just hope i'll pass this exam.th exam are based on Olevel syllabus&if i clear all th tests, i'm already prepared for th Olevel.but i know i'm nt that fit for Olevel yet, th confident is there but nt th effort.its way to minimum&i know i need much more revision.5more mnths&i must try hard enough to revise more, attempt th 10-yr-series&ask for more prelims paper.i hope that way, i could score well aye?
Olevel art is still far frm finish.midyr's is still left with colour layouts&final piece.i'll finish th midyr's tmorrow, by hook or by crook.
i'm only left with geog&chem to revise on for midyr.i'll resume my geog right after this, if hubby didnt call me up to meet.
&&talking about hubby, i've been meeting him alternate days at mac.why mac?reason is because, he hd already quit on arnold's&continue to work at macdelivery.while hes sending orders, i'll be revising.if hes back, he'll distract me.but th revisions do work on me though, i'm more prepared for midyr nw.gaga.
basically, i'm hm after meeting hubby at mac+studying with zaty.i admit, we didnt really study.th mood isnt there.theres too many distractions&i'm just too happy to be able to spend some time with hubby.mainly because, my feelings for him is getting stronger by day.i dontknow why but at th same time, evil gets better cntrol of me.i kept on thinking that hes having an affair.but zaty's th one who relieves me, encouraging me to be positive&that hubby really is serious nw.i've gt to admit, he really changed.his time is spent mainly on work&if hes at work, he'll be dragging me along.so, he wont really have the time to fool arnd.right?gahhhh.
guess what?when he left me justnw, he was pissed.his face was irritated, like fuck.reason?th guys frm my school approached me&we hd some kind of conversation.i dont really watch his reactions closely, but zaty's th one who sense some kind of jealousy frm hubby.why am i so stupid?i should have known that he'll get pissed&so i must keep a distance frm them.but why is he so petty?grrrrr.&why must he get so worked up?issshhhk!
he said that he'll call me up once he hd his bath&we'll meet.till nw, theres no news.have he reach hm, or is he out with some girl.gahhhh! i hate him! why must he make me wait?grrrrrr.
i'm out!
&&happy belated 16th nina!(:
Sunday, April 20, 2008
th days; blogg-ed at 12:20 PM
I'm currently updating my art research for midyr still.midyr is in 2wks time, i'm nt so prepared.physics&geog hmwrks are left untouched, by hook or by crook i must finish it up by tomorrow morning.its sister's 12th bday today&we'll be celebrating out later.yterday was canberrans' day, as appointed i did the reception.i was late due to noone has the initiative to wake me up.the 962bus was also taking its own sweet time, damn.if i know, i should have walked.grrrrr! overall, it was tiring.i ran up&dwn as to give the names of the VIPs at the hall.but most of the time, i did nothing.still at the end of the day, it was such an experience.i did meet hubby for a while&god, i miss him!
last friday, the plan was to study at wdlands mart mac.as expected we didnt&atlast, we walked arnd causeway pt&civic cntre.there, we encountered several funny things; frm a prson's farting to my stupid reaction at the toilet.it was hillarious&only we know what actually happened.at night, i did went to religious class.&also, i did get an unexpected call frm someone whom i know last feb.god knows what he want, i dont bother.
hubby's gonna go for NS soon, very very soon! he had received the letter&it was already late for him to defer, grrrrr.i thought i could spend my time with him more but, it was such a disappointment.i acted as if its nothing when i heard the news.but deep dwn, i was whining.he also gave 1001complaints.i should already be prepared in the first place, hes 20 anyway&he cant possibly keep running away.i just hope the remaining time spent with him would be worthwhile.
till then;
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
random. blogg-ed at 9:04 PM
hey, i dontknow why i'm in the mood to blog all of a sudden.i'm updating my art research&suddenly, here i am.basically, school was great! the groupmates never fail to put a smile on my face.the rehearsal was kinda a waste of time.but i've gotten myself a new blazer, i'm glad.&ofcourse, dearest fir did make my day.i did spend some time with him last night.&unexpectedly, i get a scolding frm him after so long.since the tragedy, never did he became so worked up over my blardy attitude.he even said those three words atlast&by looking in his eyes, i could sense the sincerity.you know he didnt utter those three words since we're close to eachother a mnth ago, i'm touched.we've settled dwn for nw but i dontknow what future might hold, i just hope for the best.it all depends on my fate though.nw i know the actual fact, i do love him but i'm nt ready to take the risk.i'm just nt totally prepared for what might happen to me, if history were to repeat itself.i'll be dying, prhaps?grrrrrrr.
today shall mark our 30th mnth anny.that really prove hw fast time flies.i really learnt alot in this r'ship.through thicks&thin, i'm in a process in becoming a stronger prson.whatever happen, i'm gonna treasure those times i spent with him.hes the apple of my eyes, his touch is just enough to give me the strength&his grips manage to give me a sense of security.that really is my weakness.i could easily fall into his trap, w/o realising anything.once bitten, twice shy.gahhhh.
i may sound like a fool, accepting fir back again after what he'd done.but noone could actually know what exactly i'm going through.its hard for me to forget him.everyone makes mistakes in their life&i believe, he really made a huge mistake during that three mnths.maybe i'm partly at fault, ignoring him for my own benefits&maybe hes too lonely.but wth?its all in the past&i really hope he change for the better.i'm also trying to put my ego aside.but i know i need to focus on my studies&yes, fir has been monitoring me.i'll strive hard&achieve a diploma in masscomm.insya'allah, a degree too.
till here, i'm gonna watch television&revise chem later at night.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
whatever; blogg-ed at 5:10 PM
regret?disappointed?heartbreak? whatever, you know karma.i dont need any man to make me feel whole.i dont think i'm mature enough to be in a r'ship anyway.if one could feel glad or lost in love at the same time, i think i'm better off alone.carefree, i need mercy.i dont know why i feel restless&my mind is full of rubbish.i thought of studying, but the mood isnt there&so, i just edit the blog&do some research for art midyr.maybe later at night, i'm gonna revise some physics&do the wrkshts.theres a test tomorrow&i'm finish in the note-taking for all topics.maybe i could score well by doing some ten-yr series.upnext, gonna revise the chem.&then, followed by ss&geog.
midyr is arnd the corner, but i'm nt so particular about it.still, i'm gonna do my very best.take it as a preparation for Olevels.
the wkends just fine.went to jb with the relatives on sat&expo johnlittle sale on sunday with the family.i should be meeting fir last sunday&yterday but too bad, i decided to ignore his calls.mainly because, i want him to feel the pressure i've been through whenever theres no calls&msges frm him.i'm sure he really is pissed off nw, i dont give a damn.but actually, i'm confused.i cant figure out my feelings for him.at one point i feel like i'm crazy over him&at the nxt point, i detest him to the core.call me a dumb or a fool, he cheated on me before laa dey&why i still think about him?grrrrrr.
till here;
Friday, April 11, 2008
cb. blogg-ed at 1:01 PM
i'm pissed off! like really.i did found out something&hell, i'm fcukin mad.i should have see it coming anyway.a liar will always be a liar, no matter hw hard one is willing to change.to hear all this frm other ppl's mouth&nt frm him, really2 make me feel embarassed.whre shall i put my face?at one point i thought that he'll change&everything would be as per normal, but my insinct isnt true.whatever it is, i must prove that i cn live w/o him by my side.pathetic moron, cb!
Thursday, April 10, 2008
celebration; recap blogg-ed at 11:30 PM
alryte, sorry for the hiatus moment.i was too busy to on the comp for the wk.school, study outings&the celebration.i'm 16, like finally! gaga.i spent my last moment of 15yrs of age with fir.atleast he managed to spend his time with me.&yes, my wish did come true.
my last wkend was spent with the fam on sat to twn&m'sia too.on sunday was spent with the relatives for aunt's openhse&a mini-celebration was held.met fir on the first moment of turning 16&i'm just glad he made it.to know that he actually remembered my bday, is already a miracle.
thanks for all the wishes+belated ones my dearest friends.i really appreciate it all.i'll treasure all the gifts&will always remember the time we spent together.my monday morning was spent in school as usual&napfa test later in the afternoon after ASP.to have napfa on one's bday was ridiculous.but i managed to get myself either grade A&B&C for all 5stations.but i need to buckup on my 2.4km run in order to get a gold.grrrrr.i had a spread at night.3slice of pizza&lasagne, i'm contented.all i do is eat,eat,eat.i'll gain weight for sure.i did went to brasbasah&nlb last tuesday in the late afternoon.i did head off to campfire for the sec2camp at night too.it wasnt as gd as lastyr or our batch earlier.but with the peeps, it was worthy.
i still had the cramps due to the 5stations till today, gahhhh.
yterday i had my 16hrs of sleep, marvellous i must say.atlast, after so long, i had a proper or should i say, a very long hours of sleep?i had no school justnw due to home-based learning but was needed to go online for assignments.i only managed to do maths as i had problems uploading the rest of the subjects.so pathetic! &the outing for justnw was cancelled but i went out studying at mcdonald's wdland mart instead.it was freezing cold.
tomorrow will be the full-dress rehersals for canberrans day.i need to pretend&usher the guests.so dragging!
till nxt time;
*nt much pics frm the celebration, my batt kept running low&my charger was with sabi, nxt yr perhaps.gaga.
Thursday, April 3, 2008
school; blogg-ed at 10:31 PM
alright, the week was spent wisely with the girls.we went out study every nw&then.school is pressurising me though, i'm just glad i cn cope despite the problems i'm facing.a load of work is being given out, but i still manage to complete them all.basically, i just came back frm school.the time was spent to fill in the malay wrksheets&submit the file.it was all thanks to those who didnt bring the file, including me.gaga.the malay teacher was really pissed off, i did it unintentionally.i really forget all about the filing thingy, i apologise.&&i'm involved in canberran's day nxt 2wk but god-knows-what i'll be doing.its our last yr to attend this kind of event, i must nt miss it then.
plenty of things happened justnw, it was really hillarious.wont elaborate much on that, i'm just lazy.despite the glummy faces&sad-ness which filled the atmosphere early in the morning, it turned into giggles&laughter at the end of the day.moodswings, i guess.but only we know what actually happen.gugugaga.
i'll end here then.i'm needed to wakeup by4&meet the girls at mac for breakfast&study for a while.gdnight(:
